You won’t feel that you have any choice once you’ve sat through this - BBC News have announced that Mong and Bint’s James Corden and Mathew Horne have signed up to make a new comedy sketch show for BBC Three.

I shit you not.

Worse, the once respected television corporation have described it as: “traditional comedy entertainment show in the style of Morecambe and Wise”

Which is tantamount to sacrilege. What business do a moon headed clip and his fat mate who couldn’t write an original gang if he was possessed by Marty Feldman have attempting to be Morecambe & Wise?

Jesus, what the hell is going on here? What next?

This really is an insult not only to Eric and Ernie but to our sensibilities. Mong and Bint is as funny as Auschwitz, award or no award - how come the pair of nomarks have this particular gig when Vic and Bob aren’t on TV, when legitimate double acts around the country are converging on Edinburgh this summer to get their work noticed?

The BBC is letting us all down, not least Corden and Horne who are way out of their depth.

Demand your licence fee back! (Or just don’t watch it)

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I was just on the phone to the hospital to arrange the date for my lobotomy when I stumbled across a Guardian blog article on the grossly overrated and unfunny Gavin and Stacey (henceforth known as “Mong & Bint”)

In it, the insightful Gareth McLean (I’m being sarcastic - but at least he’s had the temerity to say “stop - this is getting silly”) ranks up the competition between Pulling and Mong & Bint. Frankly I’ve been left cold by Pulling on a few occasions - it’s rarely moved me to write - but I’m not asking for 2 hours of my life back from that comedy.

But what was really wonderful was to see the responses to McLean’s article. I estimate that there are upwards of 50 comments on the page, almost all in agreement, incuding comments such as:

“Thank God somebody else out there is making this point!”

“What on earth is Rob Brydon doing wasting his time and talent in this?”

“Who’s letting all these actors write sitcoms anyway? ”

“And your man who plays Gavin just has the one look which he just uses throughout the show.”

So if you’re anti Mong & Bint, get over to the Guardian and leave your own thoughts.

Or just leave them via the link below…

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Following the frankly ridiculous success seen by the risible Gavin and Stacey at the BAFTA presentation on Sunday, the improbably named Boyd Hilton - TV editor of Heat magazine (we’re scraping it here, chaps) told the BBC

“I think it won because it’s a well-observed, flat-out-funny show with a cast of funny and identifiable characters,” he told the BBC News website.

Hilton believes the success of Gavin and Stacey “is a justification for the channel all by itself”.

Eh?

Despite a the presence of a couple of Britain’s most talented comic actors (how strong are your drugs, Brydon?), it remains  pale and lifeless squib of a show, that tries too hard to be a cross between The Royle Family and, well The Royle Family.

We’ll look back on this one day and laugh… at how blind you all were.

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I don’t mind new writers and actors being given breaks, but couldn’t they be honest about it?

Gavin & Stacey is described as a comedy drama.

Which is similar to describing George W Bush as warmongering christian (which he is, but that’s not the point).

Posing as a comedy drama while hidden away on BBC Three gives the series an excuse to neither be funny nor dramatic while building an unwarranted “cult” following.

While BBC Three has had success with other shows in the past, need to start reigning in the dross.

Don’t even get me started on Two Pints… or Ideal.

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